Eternity in My Heart

He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil – this is the gift of God. I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him. Ecclesiastes 3:11-14

May 10, 2008

4:37 a.m.

…a time to be silent

I rise with the light of a new day here in Estonia. Typically a late sleeper, today my heart is full with the truth of God’s beauty, his timing, and his completeness. As we conclude our eight years of service in this place, I am assured that God still sees me. Amazing! What he has done here will endure forever. Nothing is wasted in his plan – not one moment of language learning, none of the tears, not one telephone call or visit with a friend, not one fraction of loneliness.

…a time to laugh

Although I cannot see all of his purposes, I don’t need to. It’s not my job. I am simply to “do good” while I live. What better is there to do than God’s work? Gratitude wells up within me that I have had the opportunity to see God making my life and several of those around me beautiful over the last few years. And what a journey we are on as we follow him, this time to Cameroon. What is the next beautiful thing he is going to do in my life, perhaps through tears and weeping, perhaps through laughter and dancing?

…a time to uproot

Yes, we still have lots of questions. Why don’t more men revere him? Why has he allowed us to grieve the death of our dreams for ministry here in Estonia? Why do we need to uproot our family yet again? It is time to give up my search for answers and simply follow.

…a time to keep …a time to throw away

Packing comes next. How do I keep all the memories of God’s goodness? So much must be tossed, given away, or sold. The physical reminders will no longer be at hand, so in writing I erect memorial stones of my own to hold on to, to record God’s faithfulness.

…a time to speak

After months, no years, of upheaval in my heart as I mourn for the job we could not complete here, the realization that no matter how great the storm, God can calm it enters my heart. He knows when the winds blow too strongly in my life and at the right moment, he speaks. Thank you, God, for speaking this week. What may seem like a rash decision to move our family is the culmination of several years of storm. What a privilege to find satisfaction again in our toil. This is the gift of God.